End Of The Road...

 Hello my dear friends who I have neglected for so long. Its good to have my fingers back on the keyboard again. I slowly feel my bloggy brain cells returning. I didn't expect it. I was happily sitting in my backporch watching a competitive game of soccer between my kids when It just hit me. I had to write you.

So here I am. And I really have no clue where to begin. SO much has happened... and Im serious when I say so much!

ButI guess I should start by introducing our newest edition to our family!

Caleb Benjamin

made his arrival on August 18th after a long, hard and not so joyous labor.

I will save his birth story for another time but I will say that after 6 vaginal deliveries...

S-I-X... Lucky #7 arrived by an emergency c-section after hours of hard labor, no dilation, epidural complications and non stop worry of losing him. It was topped off with being put under general anesthesia halfway thru the c-section and ended with me vomiting hours later with a fresh incision due to the medication.

Yes, thats how my precious son entered this world. He was worth every pain and heartache and everyone just oohhed and ahhed over his full head of hair, with natural blond highlights.

The above picture was our first night together. It still is bittersweet to look at. I was swollen from the iv's which would later lead to even more complications and I had not slept due to nightmares I was having from the delivery the day before. It wasn't the best night of my life but holding him made it all better.

5 days after this picture was taken, I was re-admitted into the hospital due to peripardum Cardiomyopathy...

Another long story that I will elaborate on at another time but basically I was in congestive heart failure. It happened so fast, that by the time I processed it all, I was in an ambulance being transferred to another hospital and put on the old people's cardic care floor.

My eyes were practically swollen shut from crying so bad and my baby wasn't even with me. I was a mess. Im surprised they didnt put me on the mental health floor.

its a not so rare/rare complication of pregnancy/postpartum period that can be extremely fatal. Thank the good Lord in heaven, it was caught early and only moderate heart damage occurred. 

But to be honest, for a split second I felt like I slipped thru the cracks. God must have been too busy that day with other world problems and somehow little ol me ended up in a mess. I mean, I had just given birth to a baby boy... the one he TOLD me I would keep AND that it WOULD be a boy. Remember??

I had 6 other kids at home and a husband I loved to pieces... a life I adored.... I wasn't ready to go anywhere!!!!

Hubby sent out prayer requests on facebook and we prayed and prayed that others would pray on our behalf because honestly...

We just didn't have the words.

I couldn't put 2 words together.

That was 2 weeks ago. I stayed in the hospital over the weekend and was sent home 20 pounds lighter from diuretics and 7 bottles of pills to take a day.

I was treated aggressively and prayerfully, since I am responding well to my meds, will make a full recovery in about 6 months to a year.

Prayerfully. 

Thats what Im praying and believing and according to hubby...

demanding. His words..." there is no other alternative..."

So any prayers from y'all would be greatly appreciated as well!!!

Because of my heart problem, my Dr. made it quite clear that NO MORE BABIES were in my future. Next time I might not be so lucky.

So, im dealing with that which is worse than the actual problem OR c-section recovery.

I mean, I swore this was my last pregnancy but I say that during every pregnancy. And I certainly don't like decisions to be made for me. Nothing infuriates me more...

So, this piece of news has left me with a lot of questions and absolutely no closure.

Im dealing with the fact that this is the end of the road for my life as a baby maker...

and its hard.

But besides that, taking it easy and lots of dr visits, life is continuing in our little red house.

I havent even begun to tell you about the surgery my Miss. P had a week before Caleb was born or what Link the cat put us through...

His furry butt was almost out on the street...

But i'll save that for another day soon!!!

After all, how much excitement can you take in one blog post??

Xoxo

GiGi