Monday, March 23, 2009

S-T-O-P The Insanity!

Rewind 20 years. Do you remember that super skinny middle aged lady on t.v with an almost shaved head and white/blond stubble?? She would jump all over the stage encouraging people to lose weight! She would scream loudly ..."STOP THE INSANITY!!!"
 Thats what I feel like right now. Can you guess why? Im potty training child #4... The boy! I have pridefully gloated before at other parents at how easy potty training can be. Whats the big deal? Why is it so hard for YOU? Its really not rocket science. My words have come back to bite me on the bottom! 
 Today is day #2. Usually by now, my girls are past the thick cloth training pants and have moved on to normal princess panties. Well, Noah has not quite reached anywhere near that point.
 After one pee in the corner, one pee in the closet, one pee in my foyer (on my wood floors mind you) and one large poop in his underwear, he is currently running thru the house commando! The wash is on and the dryer is crankin!!!  The only progress being made are the bets going on to see how much toilet paper will it take to clog the downstairs bathroom.
  He already flashed all the kids in the neighborhood by standing in the foyer window enjoying the spring breeze. Once Hannah came running thru the home mortified that her friends saw her little brothers pee pee, I quickly ushered him away and checked the dryer. Thank GOD the newest batch of undies were dried. I quickly dressed him and the training began again.
 I have a big glass jar of yummy jelly beans waiting to be devoured at the first sprinkle in the toilet. Right now its hiding in my snack cabinet collecting dust. We have had no need for it yet.
 Feeling discouraged and needing words of advice, I called my good friend back in NY...
"Hi _____" I said..." I have a quick question for you. Is your son potty trained yet?"
"How was it?"
" Horrible. It was the worst thing I had to do. We are still doing it. Girls are sooo much easier..."

I had to laugh. At least I knew I was not alone. We swapped boy stories of what they had recently discovered and how many ways pee can escape from a toilet.
 I now have hope!! Not that he will ever be trained... but that I will make it through
 A friend is coming to visit in April and she wants to rescue her favorite man from the horrible toilet. I think she might find a little blond boy standing on her doorstep before she has the chance to visit... No, I could never live without my little man, just his stinky smelly diapers.=)


  1. My daughter got a potty and panties for her second birthday and the day after her second birthday she was potty forward to first son...he is five years old and still is having accidents in his pants after three years of potty training. I am happy to report that he is now in his forties and no longer has accidents. There is life after potty training.

    Have a Marvelous Monday
    from the Raggedy Roberta Anne

  2. Ha, ha - Oh, No - what do I have to look forward to! At least I started with a boy, so if we end up having girls I will have already gone through the worst. ;)

  3. I waited until Nicholas turned three, to even try to potty train him. My friends and family were freaked out and not even slightly supportive of my decision. He potty trained in two days. He was finished potty training at the same time as all of my friends boy's who started a year earlier. Only difference, my stress lasted two days, their's---a year! HA! All of my friends (at that time), still felt superior to me because they tried earlier... :-) Good luck!!



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