WHAT???
What happened?
This subject has been discussed a lot between hubby and I. Why do people, christian and non christian, divorce?
Say what we want to say, bottom line is Satan loves to kill and destroy anything that is holy. What better way to destroy someone's life than to break up a Holy Sanctity such as marriage?
The sad thing is, we let him.
While I was eating my bagel and drinking my coffee this morning, I was skimming thru my facebook. One of my friends who I don't know as well as I would like to, asked a thought provoking question.
"Whats the 1 piece of marriage advice you would give out to someone who is about to get married?"
Hmm, 1 piece? Thats it? Well if you just want to give one piece, they won't get very far before harsh words are being thrown around and tears are produced.
See, thats the problem. Its something that needs to be seen. It needs to be heard. It needs to be felt.
It needs to surround that person like a blanket. Security.
Marriage is a lifestyle, not an act. Its life changing, its taught over years and years of seeing tender embraces. Its watched as mom cares and loves for dad and as dad comes home from work happy to see his family.
Its a precise circle of love that once gets on track runs as smooth as silk.
Unfortunately society has taught us, has brainwashed us, exactly how to avoid that track. In a world where the words I, Me and Mine have overcome the words... Till death do us part.
A world where respect and commitment have been replaced with self seeking desires and excuses.
As I sit here drinking my coffee, I hope and pray that hubby and I set a better example for our children. I pray we can be an example to other peoples children.
We don't have a perfect life. We fight, we yell, we (I) nag (just a bit ;) but at the end of the day we love.
But we refuse to let satan get a foothold of us.
Not today, not tomorrow. Not in our home.
Just some thoughts running thru my head on a saturday morning. Now to clean the bathroom...
I've thought about this myself. What I have observed is that people say for better or for worse, but what they mean is, as long as worse isn't what I think is unforgiveable.
ReplyDeleteThe best advice we got when getting married is, divorce isn't even part of your vocabulary, it's not an option. We've stuck to that, through some tough times.
Yet, I think what I would say to a young couple is, imagine your spouse doing the worst thing you can imagine; an affair, committing murder, etc. If they got caught in an affair, or went to jail for an unthinkable thing like sex with a minor, would you be willing to stick by them and try to work it out and suffer the consequences with them. Becuase sometimes, the thing they do may be unforgiveable, when like you said, Satan sneaks in to destroy, and he most definitely will at some point to even the best Christians. but if you can't forgive the unforgiveable, and pray for healing, then you aren't trully committed to them for worse, only better.
once I have explained to couples, the only excuse for divorce the Bible allows, is the hardening of the heart (when Moses and Jesus speak of adultery, this is what they mean). That means if your partner has hardened their heart toward you, you have no choice, but to proceed with the divorce as they desire. Otherwise, it is your vow that you will work with them to work through it, and pray for healing.
I've done it, made it through what I thought was the unthinkable, and I've known other couples who have done it too, but only by the Grace of God Himself.
that's the key, do you trust in yourself to make it work and avoid the schemes of the devil, or in God?
And can you rest in the fact, that even when you do screw up, let Satan get a foothold in your life, as we all do becuase the Bible says, "All have sinned," will your spouse be there to fight against the schemes of the devil beside you, or will they pack up and say, You've made your bed, now you have to lie in it. I am so happy that we chose to trust in God in our darkest hours of marriage.
Oh, and I'm proud to say, I am so very much in love with that man I kept my promise to. Can't even begin to describe how much in love!
Oh, I want to share a story that illustrates my point, trusting in God.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was in college, our college minister had an affair with a co-worker. He was simply trying to help her through some tough times in her marriage, and bam, Satan got a foothold.
His wife was pregnant with their 5th child. He lost his job for the relationship with a co worker, (6figures) then he moved out and moved in with his mistress. Becuase of the state law, they couldn't divorce until the baby was born. But after she was born,the divorce proceeded. I think it was at least one year, maybe more that they were separated.
Immediately after he left, his wife, who could not change his hardened heart, cleaned out a closet and began to spend hours a day in that closet praying for her husband to come back. She called believers and asked the to pray and hold him accountable for what he had done. She prayed until the day he came home.
She said he walked through the door, fell to the ground and began to sob, telling her how wrong he'd been. It's been about ten years since this precious couple faced the unthinkable, but what a blessed man, to have a wife, who never gave up asking for God's help in healing her marriage, in order to reunite their precious family. To keep her vow, to love and honor, even when he was unloveable, and unworthy of honor. Becuase of her committment, he was restored to her and his kids, and to God. Praise the LORD, becuase they still do ministry today!
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ReplyDeletevery good and VERY true. Hard topic, but one that Jesus and the disciples where completely unafraid to tackle.
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